🚨✨Here’s the final fully edited video. ✨🚨
Fair warning: I’m about to get personal.
When this opportunity came up — a chair dance to Whitney Houston’s “I Have Nothing” in a rain-room studio — my inner child screamed “yes” before the adult in me could overthink it. He’s always been the fearless one. The kid who loved sparkles My Little Pony flowers & anything bright. Growing up in the 80s gender lines were strict & I pushed against every one. I never understood why boys couldn’t love pretty things too.
I was 9 when this song came out. That’s around the time society started to win. I started hiding pieces of myself. But my inner child is relentless in finding outlets, so around that time I was figure skating. (😉) And even though I had to “skate to boy songs,” this song would play during practice — and no one could stop me from skating to it.
My motivation for doing this was a tribute to him. To that younger version of me who already knew exactly who he was long before the world tried to tell him otherwise. A moment for him to reclaim my adulthood. A place to stand between who I was, who I am, and who I’m becoming.
The lyric “I have nothing if I don’t have you” hits differently now. That boy and this man — we both showed up for this.
During these two minutes everything went quiet masculinity, femininity, sexuality, code switching, body images - all the voices about who I should be or how this would look. I was not performing. I was not trying to fit anything. I just felt beautiful. I felt like myself.
Working with artists every day this reminded me why I love what I do. I can’t support anyone if I forget what it feels like to take creative risks myself. I had a vision for this and followed it.
Deep gratitude to
@dean_elex for creating the vision & space for this moment & to the team who held it with me.
Grateful for my dance community friends & family’s support 💖
Creator & Choreographer Dean Bais
@dean_elex
Videographer Joshua Bergner
@joshua_bergner
Photography Melanie Laval
@melalaval
Assistant & Barre Coach Jasmine Vinuya
@jkvee
Makeup Jonah Albrektsen
@namebrandmonica
Styling Jason Duffy
@chumduffy
#whitneyhouston #chairography #maledancer
