Today is World Fencing Day and it seems like the perfect time to make the belated announcement that I am in fact retired from this sport. I’d been holding off on admitting to myself and others that I am “retired” since this both makes me sound old and like I’m burning the bridge of what this sport used to be in my life. I do know I am retired from the role fencing used to take in my daily existence: waking up at 5am for drills, traveling to a new country or city’s convention center every other weekend, and dreaming about bouts with real and fictional people in my sleep. This niche sport had been a big part of every aspect of my time for an entire decade. I tried out being a coach for many young and inspiring athletes when I first moved to New York City. Even though I haven’t competed in 2 years, the fencing community is still a strong force in my life. Fencing is a lifelong membership into a dysfunctional family of people crazy enough to dedicate themselves to electric stick tag.
Now I am focusing entirely on my artistic pursuits outside of my day job, but what l’m missing most about fencing is the physical and emotional outlet it provided. Anyone who knows me outside of fencing would be surprised that I was such an aggressive and angry competitor. In the normal world I rarely show rage or many heightened emotions, but when I was fencing it was like unlocking a repressed personality. When she would come out, I would go into a fugue state (this would either help or hurt my performance at tournaments lol). This alter ego was a bloodthirsty bull in a china shop who screamed and frothed at the mouth. My coach used to tell me, “Gillian smash!” and my nickname was The Beast. The second I’d start fencing this chaotic force would seep out that, these last two years, has not appeared. I kind of miss her, that Tasmanian devil hiding deep inside my soul. I know she’s in there. For now she’s “retired” until I find the next outlet for her to come out.
If you or anyone you know self identifies as boring please get in touch with @fencingharpist
#interesting #interestingpeople #boringpeople #documentaryfilmmaking #humansofnewyork #nyc
Santorini in November, on a mix of iPhone and 35mm film. My kindred spirit and I try our best to meet in the center between our two homes (New York and Hong Kong) once a year. In 2025 we were supposed to meet in Egypt, only for plans to fall through (long story). Within 24 hours we pivoted to Greece, took a ferry, and ended up here. For some reason no one wants to travel to the Greek Islands in the winter even though it’s just as beautiful, if not more so, without crowds. It was sometimes eerie, having the white houses and blue-domed churches to ourselves minus the seasonal Albanian construction workers, cats, and donkeys. We took a 3 hour hike along the volcanic caldera to see the sunset from the village of Oia, only passing a few schoolchildren and grandparents along the way, reconnecting on our last year apart, the friendship feeling the same as when we were 17.
Some of 2025’s best harp moments.
This was the year I reconnected with and reignited my love for my instrument through unconventional ways. All thanks to meeting talented weirdos in the scene willing to pull off silly stunts with me. Here’s to performing the whole spectrum of musical experiences. I can’t wait for what music 2026 has waiting.
First image by @ianthehenderson
Festuring musical explorations with @borbo.the.clown@maximum_security_prism@rxzzomusic@ipad.infant@louisvanhoutven@quanico_quico@eplorium
Haven’t been to the Grand Canyon since I could fit inside a hiking backpack. Now I’m back as a tourist in my home state and seeing rainbow after rainbow in the remnants of the zero-visibility rain. 🌈
Photos of me by @ficlarn
Struggling to wrap my mind around how she’s been gone a month. It’s a miracle anytime someone this special walks into your life, and Edda was the guiding light, the North Star, for so many people. We started out as 5th grade enemies, but in 6th grade realized we completed each other and never looked back. Our different personalities were the yin and yang. She helped me stay organized and was the voice of reason. I helped her let loose and be silly. No coming-of-age-adventure hijinx were complete without Edda. Almost every journal entry I have written from 2012-2018 has her in it. Together we navigated the awkwardness of growing up until it was not so awkward anymore (enjoy our cringe preteen throwbacks). I never thought our lifelong journey would have an endpoint.
This month I’ve been doing the things Edda loved: Getting lost while hiking, stumbling upon clarinet music, Mr. Bean binges, Swedish meatballs, competitive swimming, and holiday sock exchanges. I will always find her in the patterns of love, life, and friendship.
Last week, our screening series 𝐃𝐚𝐫𝐤𝐑𝐨𝐨𝐦 returned to The Film-Makers’ Cooperative! Our program, curated by @brianratigan and @elizabethyooart , concluded with the great @fencingharpist performing a live score to a rarely screened Stan Brakhage short! Thank you @matt.mckz for having us back, @filmcoop for providing the pristine 16mm prints, and Elizabeth aka @lejazznik for creating the beautiful zines 🎞️
Two more chances to catch a 𝐃𝐚𝐫𝐤𝐑𝐨𝐨𝐦 Screening this month (Dec 13 at @yonkersarts and Dec 23 at @freddysbrklyn ), both with new lineups of independent films. 𝐅𝐑𝐄𝐄 to attend + donations encouraged for the artists. See you there!
#NonFilmsDarkRoom
