January 12th, 2020, I lost you. I thought that all the pain and suffering from the past decade was finally over but there’s always a set back, it’s always something and they say things happen for a reason but why you? My heart is crushed and my soul is overflowing of rage and hatred towards the people that took you away from us. Im so angry cause they not only changed my life but they’ve changed so many other lives just because they couldn’t squash beef with you like real men; falling under the statistic of black men killing each other everyday over dumb shit. A statistic that I don’t understand and fucking weary of... When I first heard the news, I wished that you called moments later to tell us it was all a joke. I wish you were immortal. I wish that I could go back in time. Even though I went to your funeral, I’m still in disbelief. I’m still waiting on your FaceTime call so I can see your big beautiful brown eyes and your perfect smile. I’m going to miss when you call me Dessi Pooh, or when you sing that Destiny Pookie song, or just the tone of your voice when you call me Lil Sis and the “I Love You” at the end of our calls. Grandma told us to never say bye because bye means forever. I don’t want to say bye, I can’t. I don’t want to accept this and I want you to come back home.
Damn, why you? Why my brother? I love all of my brothers but you and I had a different bond. You had a different and special bond with all of your siblings though. You reminded me that I am beautiful and that I don’t ever need love from a man because you always showed and reminded me of how much I am loved. You were always open ears when I needed to talk and always gave genuine advice and support. You always had my back no matter what, and you were my protector. Damn, this shit hit close. I miss you SO much, Nick. I promise to always keep you proud. I promise to always keep your girls’ together and to always keep you in their memories. 🖤🤞🏾 I don’t have to ask you to walk along my side and watch over us because I know you are and always will. You’re always in my heart. Until we meet again Big Bro.
I LOVE YOU -Dessi Pooh
@marciano_214 #dolodommo
