2025 Photo dump! Very grateful for the new friends, new job, new home and all the beautiful weddings this year. Nice solace amongst quite the turbulent year. Can we make enemies overrated in 2026? Just keep your friends close and tell them why you love them. 🙂↕️Long live our sweet William x
I never knew most of my biological grandparents, but I was lucky enough to grow up with many surrogate ones, including my godfather’s mother. She was very sharp-tongued but fun (she was Nigerian, to put it simply). There was a particularly memorable two weeks when I was visiting Memphis, where Fefe and I kept an eye on her while our parents were out of town. It involved lots of gardening, her telling me about the Biafra war in the 60’s, and the ever constant “When are you going to settle down with a nice lady?” (“Grandma, I still live with roommates...”) Her hearing aid wasn’t working, so there was a lot of me writing things down on paper, her reading them, and then answering. You’d be surprised at how effective this is: we’d do this for hours.
Earlier this month my parents called to tell me that she’d passed away. Living till your 90s is no small achievement! But I do miss her.
These pictures were taken the last time I saw her: this past May, when my family and I traveled to Nigeria to commemorate what would’ve been my Dad’s Mom’s 100th birthday (does this count as situational irony?) She lived nearby, so my Dad and a bunch of uncles decided to visit her that evening, and I asked to go with them. It was a very lovely evening. She was as witty as ever, and I was more than happy to park myself beside her as she held court! While I never would’ve guessed that those would be my last moments with her, they couldn’t have been better. That’s all one can ask for really.
And it’s something I’ve been thinking about more and more. Not a day goes by that I don’t think of a certain Will Fite (my best friend, brother, and, quite frankly, the platonic love of my life). Our Wicked Lady, a community space where I’ve gotten to meet so many current friends and special people in my life, just closed down. They’re even coming for PBS! For some of these, the fight isn’t over. But it’s still overwhelming emotionally when things reach their conclusion. But perhaps there’s some truth to appreciating the moments that were had and not taking the current ones for granted. “Glass half full” and all that jazz.
I struggle to find words that can do justice to my brother. I miss his dry sense of humor, always good natured but cheeky. I miss his genuine curiosity for music, foreign languages, and literature. Particularly with music, it was a big element that cemented our friendship. It made me so happy to see the way he embraced it, going from someone just starting to learn bass to a multi-instrumental composer in his own right.
He had a heart that knew no boundaries and was always adamant about seeing something from multiple perspectives, putting oneself in someone else’s shoes, and being mindful of those around you. In the 12 years that I knew him I can scarcely think of a moment of feeling judged: you could come to him with anything. We only ever had one fight.
Meeting Will was like finding a long lost twin (or triplet, sorry Fefe). I’ll never experience that again, but I had over a decade of it, sharing jokes, turning each other onto different music, laughing at our general awkwardness, surviving high school, and just trying to make sense of the world as a whole.
You can’t spend that much time with someone and not expect them to rub off on you. Though he’s gone, our friendship continues: wherever I go, his presence is with me. When in a rough patch, I’ll think “What would Will do here?” When I play music, I’ll remember all of the hours we spent in my bedroom jamming together and how he gave me the confidence to share my own compositions with others. He and his parents would go on about how much of an impact I had on him, but HIS impact on ME is immeasurable.
I wish we could’ve seen our friendship bloom into old age, could still be the best men at each other’s weddings, godfathers to our future kids. But I cling to my memories of him, and more importantly I thank the heavens that I got to spend so much time with him. These memories of such a good and selfless person are a powerful talisman, a reminder that folks like him can indeed exist. It behoves one to aspire to the levels of empathy, emotional intelligence, and honesty that he once carried so gracefully.
An ode to my darling brother, my shadow, and my best friend.
Coming out of instagram hibernation to proudly announce that Alphabet City (@aleeessah , @maximumhad , and myself) just dropped its first piece of music! “Yesterday’s Papers” is now available on streaming. 🥲
Everyone who knows me knows I’m obsessed with music. Today’s a bit of a special day. Big ups to my band mates and the new friends we’ve made along the way.
In celebration, we’re playing a show at the Windjammer in Ridgewood tomorrow evening if you want to come say hey :)
The Spotify and Apple Music links are in my bio.
Single art by @aleeessah
Mixing and engineering by @maximumhad
Music and lyrics @yaresaurus
Photo and video dump of random music shenanigans from this year (as this year is coming to an end and all that jazz).
I’m thankful to my crew (@alyssatumale and @maximumhad ) for putting up with my endless hours of mansplaining the relevancy of The Beatles.
We’ll see you all next year :)
