Back on set! And stoked to be here! Thoughts…. I didn’t realize it but over the years I found my identity in all the wrong places. It especially became apparent last year as I was up for 3 MAJOR jobs. One amazing film production, and two sick modeling jobs. I was only on option or pinned for these, but I was telling everybody about them. I was finding my self worth in these projects. I noticed I was telling people about these situation so that they would know I’m on this level or I’m up for these types of jobs. Because in the end I wanted to be valued. And I think at the very root cause I want to be loved, and worthy of love. So, I started working on my identity. I realized God is the giver of all things and he wasn’t giving me these bookings. So it made me look introspectively into what was going on and that led me to begin working on my identity. I asked my best friend
@justiskao how to reshape my thoughts, and he gave me Philippians 4:8 “Finally, brothers and sisters, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable—if anything is excellent or praiseworthy—think about things.” as I meditated on what is true, I realized that the truth was my identity was in God. That he was my provider, protector, my fortress, my leader, my enabler, etc.. my identity was beginning to change. Every day I would state in prayer all of the things God was to me. Another huge, huge, huge opportunity came at the end of last year and they did an avail check on me. I was very aware of how I would deal with the situation. I definitely did better than before but probably not perfect. I did not get the job but it was certainly a test. Today I am thankful that I booked my first audition of the year. I am proud to say that I’m probably not perfect but I handled the whole situation way better. Kind of foolish to become arrogant or prideful about something that is given to you. I hope this helps somebody. Thank you God that I can post this with a clear mind and a pure heart.