Extremely mixed year: career highlights (a piece I composed premiered at the Barbican at an LSO concert) mingled and rubbed shoulders with lifelong low points (chronic illness, major surgery, emergency re-hospitalisation). I quit 1 job, had 3 hospital stays, played 0 gigs (not by choice, I might add), released 1 song, 1 music video, recorded 31 podcast episodes, took 2 pictures of heart-shaped potatoes, and moved house one (1) time. I would love to say that I learned something valuable, but I never do. Whatever 2026 has in store for me, I’ll face it with the same frantic neurosis concealed behind implacable frostiness that has defined my life.
Don’t let my blank expression fool you*, I’m ecstatic about the kind things people have said about my new song and music video, TRUE FREAK, in the 2 weeks since it was released. I’m especially enamoured with my treasured friends and mutuals’ reactions, as I value their opinions so highly. But also very grateful to the two blogs who beneficently featured it.
*I don’t know how to look normal/smiley/happy in selfies and I never will learn.
🌜Want a free tarot reading?🌛 The music video for my new song TRUE FREAK is out now. You can watch it on YouTube. Link, as ever, in bio.
I directed it in collaboration with my talented husband @jhnjmsjhnjmsjhnjms who also made all the 3D elements. And it was a labour of love, shooting it whenever we had time between ferrying me back and forth to hospital procedures and medical tests, battling chronic illness and working 2 day jobs. I spent my convalescence from surgery editing it, whenever I had the energy.
I’m very proud of it, I think it’s my best music video yet, and I hope you will consider watching it.
I used Dither Boy, the incredible and very reasonably priced dithering software from Studio AAA @albumartarchive to bring the tarot cards to life.
🎵 My new song TRUE FREAK is out on all platforms now… Iink in biо 🌛🌜
The music video will be arriving expeditiously…
Cover photography and 3D elements by @jhnjmsjhnjmsjhnjms
Today I underwent major surgery to address the chronic illness that has been plaguing my life for close to 3 years and all but halted my non-existent career as a singer-songwriter. It has taken countless medical appointments across 3 GP surgeries, and 3 referrals to 3 specialist consultants to diagnose why I have been mysteriously ill for so long (in short: my stomach valve was broken). And although there is not a 100% guarantee that the surgery will improve my symptoms, I feel tentatively (hopefully) as though the end of my torment is in sight. Last year I was privileged enough to be invited by treasured friends to play 3 live shows and this year I desired wholeheartedly to play at least 3 more, but so far those plans have been cruelly scuppered because my symptoms have deteriorated drastically, causing me near constant discomfort and pain. Nevertheless I have stubbornly persisted! And in between the worst bouts of sickness, I have been working quietly and diligently on new music and a new live set. Providing I triumph over my haters by fully recovering from surgery, I still have some tricks (and songs) left up my sleeve. So, to my five dearly devoted fans (you know who you are): I pray, god willing, that I will have something music-shaped for you to enjoy in what’s left of 2025. Love and blessings xxx
Some of the official photos from the premiere of my piece ‘No abras nunca esa puerta’ at the @londonsymphonyorchestra lunchtime concert last month.
Thank you to @lamjoyce for putting together such a lovely concert in such a special venue. And thank you to my fellow composers @amy.crankshaw , @lukemombrea & @nomrik . This was my first time having a piece played at an LSO concert, so thank you for being welcoming and kind to a nervous newcomer!
Also a special thank you to Olivia Gandee, Holly Clark, and Ben Jarvis for playing my piece so expressively and sensitively!
Photos by Wai Lok Cheung.
Ecstatic to share that my piece No abras nunca esa puerta will be premiered by musicians of the @londonsymphonyorchestra at the @barbicancentre on the 20th of June, alongside two other composers’ works.
No abras nunca esa puerta continues my obsession/inquiry into false memories and incorrect assumptions about the noir film in the popular imagination.
Tickets are free, the concert is at lunchtime in the glorious conservatory, and the Iink is in my biо. 🔗
3 gigs, 2 new songs and 1 music video. Not bad for a bitxh with no career! Thank you to every single person who came to see me play live, streamed or bought my music, wrote about me on a blog, or watched one of my music videos in 2024. You will never know how much your support means, because I simply can’t put it into words! Two years ago I considered quitting music (I’m very dramatic) because although I’d had a song featured on a fairly well known music blog, literally nothing else was happening in my career. I felt despondent and hopeless, but it turns out the answer was performing live, my first love! Who knew? Wishing for peace and emotional wellbeing for everyone in 2025, even my enemies. Thank you especially to my patient and perfect husband, @jhnjmsjhnjmsjhnjms . And my friends @milocrowther and @badmoonwolf for supporting me by coming to all my gigs!
Playing a lovely little support slot for @2008crash.major.record.label show on Monday evening at The Pipeline! Come through! It’s a PaIestine fundraiser so ticket price supports a great cause. Plus sweet music 👍 (face included for the cursed god of the aIgorithm)
