my year
this was a year of my highest highs and lowest lows. thank you to everyone who made me better this year, allowed me into their hearts, and showed love and compassion to everyone around them. I think 2026 is gonna be a big year, and i cannot wait to continue pursuing my goals and loving everyone around me.
death is too insanely real.
last week, my aunt was tragically murdered in her fort collins home.
dealing with 2 deaths in succession is an impossible task for anyone. there’s simply too much work for anyone to have time to grieve.
as i walked through my grandmothers house today, taking a break from the logistics that is this tragedy, i was reminded of the exigence of my grief. i’m not here crying because my grandma and my aunt both died in succession, i’m crying because i will never experience them again. i will never get to see my grandma waddle around with her leaped like sunglasses, never see my aunt win another bodybuilding medal. i will never see either of these people for as long as i live, which is too long of a time to even imagine; you can’t imagine any more time past that because you won’t be there.
in comparison, as i walked though downtown fort collins alone today, it put those moments into perspective. they’re gone, but every other human on this earth is still living their life. so i sat down with a cookie and a cortado to watch life unfold before my eyes. this meditation on the solo experience of grief helped me immensely in my journey on bettering myself.
i will miss Kathryn Barnes Power and Lindsey Jean Power as long as i live.
and i will continue to be a human with a life separate from every other human as long as i live.
goodnight Grandma K and Lindsey.
