· dp reel .
for most of my life, the thought of breaking into the film world and finding a place where i belonged in it felt equally as probable as going to space - a ridiculous belief to have but maybe that's something only some of us will ever understand.. and those who do, maybe you know what it feels like to carry the weight of a desire that felt like it was never meant to be yours. looking back on all that has unfolded in the last year, i'm grateful for the experiences that have led me here, that gave me hope in a challenging time, and the people who made the impossible begin to feel vaguely possible.. to all the lovely souls i've been so fortunate to encounter and collaborate with so far (some mentioned here but not all), thank you for your trust and for sharing your love of this craft with me. and to those who have guided and encouraged me along the way, thank you for giving me the courage to finally step into this space..
🖤
for the first time, i travelled to another city in malaysia without my usual guide. if you were still here, you'd be the one taking us around to all the good places to eat and we'd be wandering the streets together. i remember the last time i was here with you - i had to look back into my archives to find a photo of a moment i remember vividly, a memory that embodies many things i cherished about you in a nutshell - and i was surprised to realize that was 10 years ago. i grew up seeing this country through your eyes, everything i loved and held dearly was because of the roots you planted for us that kept me grounded while i was building a life far away. coming back now just over a year since losing you, i'm slowly picking up the pieces of what remains and making peace with what was lost.. making sense of it all through a new set of eyes.. learning what it means to call this place home, without you in it.. and reminding myself to live a little through it all
24.12.2025
one year on and i'm realizing you were never truly gone
death claims a body but love lies bleeding as it carries on with no place to call home. maybe if you dare you let it wander freely.. and unknowingly, it quietly returns to you one day, looking at you with tender eyes
