On the night of April 1st, I sat on Bo’s lap to say goodnight. He tucked my hair behind my ear, gave me a big kiss, and assured me that, despite how tough 2026 has already been, we were going to have a great year together.
We had big plans. We just signed for our first place together, and all we could talk about recently is how excited we were to officially have a home to share. The only routine either of us had was to get coffee every morning and plan new and exciting things to experience together. He understood me in ways no one else has. He assured me every single day that he would always love me, and do anything to protect me. He has spent our entire relationship going above and beyond, and doing anything and everything for me. There are not words to describe the amount of love I have for him.
I was his biggest fan, and he was mine. I would go to any show I could, and recently started trying to catch more and more Hardlore interviews in person. He would always encourage me to take on new projects. In fact, he would then film them for me and give me honest and helpful feedback if needed. We cheered each other on and supported each other through everything. He held me through my worst moments and challenged me to be my best self.
Whenever I would thank Bo for all that he does, he would say “I know you would do the same for me”. Truly, I would have done anything for him. I was with him until the very end, and I hope that he knows I will carry him in my heart for the rest of my life. He was, and will always be everything to me.
I love you forever, Baba. Thank you for being mine and showing me the world. I promise to live an exciting life full of kindness, adventure, and delicious food all for you.
this has been the longest and most challenging month of my life. i wish bo was with me to celebrate our new place, and i wish my parents could see how awesome it is.
i know some people think sharing grief so publicly online can be cringey, but the amount of people i’ve had privately message me to thank me for being open and honest is astounding. i feel comfortable sharing the more challenging moments because i know it helps people come to terms with their own grief. if i can help even one person feel a little less alone in their struggles, perhaps being a little cringe is worth it.
you are never alone. feeling depressed? dial 988 for help. ✨
#grief #suicideprevention #parentalloss #partnerloss
the past three weeks have been the absolute worst of my life. i legitimately do not think i would be here right now if it weren’t for the constant love and support i am receiving from all of mine and bo’s family and friends. so, this is a quick check in to say thank you to everyone that has reached out. i am beyond grateful for this community looking out for me and him.
despite the heartache, i am happy that we got to attend one final wrestling event together, and share a coffee beforehand. actually, i still have bo’s last coffee occupying a cup holder at the front of my car. i also found a postcard he secretly bought for me while we were in Nashville together. it means a lot that i have a final one to add to the collection of postcards he’s sent me from around the world.
i talk to him every single day, and when something goes wrong i ask him for help. he always finds a way to show up and fix it.
i miss him so fucking much and would give anything to be singing and dancing with him around the apartment one last time.
i love you, bo. i cannot wait to find you again and again in this life as well as the next. 🍯💫🐝
Bohan Daniel Lueders, 1987 - Forever.
Beloved to the world, our Bo passed away on April 2nd, 2026.
This gofundme is for his mother Wendy and girlfriend Taylor to help cover the costs of both afterlife & memorial services in Chicago. ***DONATIONS CLOSED***
Thank you for reading, thank you for donating, and thank you for being kind to Bo. The link is in our bio.
i want to see the sun blotted out of the sky .𖥔 ݁ ˖ ✦ ‧₊˚ ⋅
fit:
dress: @forever21
bag: vintage @coach
shoes: @puma
#fitcheck #dallas #texas #gothstyle
I am thrilled to announce I am once again partnering with @plannedparenthoodwi ! For more information on the various affordable services they offer, how to donate, and other ways to support them, check out the link in my bio!
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