My first Mother's Day. Before having my daughter, I remember my dear friend @hulinalina saying that motherhood changed her to be the 2.0. version of herself. My other mother friends agreed as well. Now I understand. Motherhood is so powerful and it has changed me to the core. And I feel so freaking proud of it. Kake 2.0.
Sending congrats to all the loving mothers out there and warm hugs for everybody that this day feels difficult for any reason🩷
2025 was a year of growth. I’ve become a mother to the most amazing daughter🩷
Getting here has been a process. For many years I was unsure if I wanted to have children. I knew I’d have mother instincts but I also had so many other goals and interests in life and I was afraid that a child would make them impossible to access. Then, we decided to try, but had some setbacks. I started to be afraid that this would not happen for us. Now, I am feeling so incredibly grateful that she is here.
Everything in the process of having a child comes with two sides: it is the happiest and heaviest time at the same time. My IG from pregnancy time is mostly happy moments of dancing or having fun, but it is not the whole truth. Pregnancy, childbirth and recovering from that has been extremely heavy on the body and mind. It made me wonder about all the silent suffering that women and birthgivers deal with, and how it is often forgotten when everybody focuses on the child. We are literally sacrificing our bodies to a thunderstorm like no other. It is scary. Carrying a child changes everything in the body system and it requires and deserves special attention and recovery.
Pregnancy and childbirth triggered old traumas about health issues and sexual violence and reminded about the fragility of life. I think never in my life I had to overcome so many major fears in a short time period. But damn I did that! I am coming off 2025 stronger than ever, a grown version of myself, ready to try to be the best possible mother for her.
We are used to the narrative how heavy parenting is with the sleepless nights etc. (It is also true). But what I didn’t understand before was the indescribable happiness that a child brings. I forget about the sleepless night the second she smiles at me in the morning🥹
She has an intense gaze, so much spirit in her eyes. My baby dragon🐉 She is also so calm when there is music and dancing - I guess she got used to it already in my uterus🥰
Thank you @larrihimma for the life we created together. You are my family like never before🩷
2026 I am ready!
Me and the baby got a beautiful Brazilian zouk birthday roda couple of weeks ago in our lovely community🥰 So happy to get this memory from this special time🩷 Thank you @bananaexpress
for capturing it🙏
Thank you all the dear zoukers in @helsinki_zouk , @helsinkidancecentral and especially @dessazouk and @itsfreddymarinho for making this happen💫
Now its time to focus more on the inside and get connected with my inner self before labor. I will be more offline and away from messaging/contacts. So if I don't answer, its not personaI and I hope you understand🙏
#helsinkidancecentral #helsinkizouk
TW: PREGNANCY ANNOUNCEMENT
If everything goes well, our little family is growing in the autumn🥰
What a roller coaster this has already been and it will get even more intense. So far I can say that motherhood is about living all the emotions to the full extent, and making every decision consciously for a better world with more love. I feel so excited and grateful about it🙏
Thank you my dear Larri for loving us every day and making this possible🩷 I admire you so much and can’t wait to grow our love together💫
Now that I have been on a holiday for a few days, it is actually truly hitting me how stressed I have been lately. The last few months have included losses, sorrows and extreme stress for the body and soul. I am also still recovering from the sinusitis and I feel that my body needs rest. I get panic attacks because of the anafylactic reaction I had couple of weeks ago and it feels scary to travel alone. I can feel the fragility of life more than usually.
I came here for the Warsaw Zouk Festival, and as all the experiences from this festival before were so amazing, I had high expectations. I feel dissapointed that my body is not able to dance the way I wanted as I am still recovering. I've been mad at my body for not co-operating.
Last night I did a long streching, meditation and breath work session on my own and it helped me to release emotions and accept all the losses, sorrows and my condition as it is. Maybe my body is wiser than my mind🌱
Today I will finally go to see the festival vibe. I am not sure if I will be able to dance, but at least I will meet friends from all over the world. And selfishly I am gonna take in all the support and hugs that I can possibly get🩷
After years of hard work and many weeks of heavy pressured recruitment process - I was offered a permanet job contract!!💪 It is an achievement that feels particulary important at this point of my life and in this economic situation. And it did not come easy. I will continue to work for better mental health of students, people who suffer for domestic violence, equality for refugees and minorities and sexual rights. I feel so lucky. Feeling that I am right where I belong🥰 Kippis!🥂
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#cheers #kippis #hardwork #permanentcontract #job #career #equality #sexualrights
