How quickly the days turn into years.
2025 has been a rollercoaster. The highs and lows of life have felt particularly high and especially low the last 12 months. The first half of the year felt like everything was going to plan, my fitness was at an all time high, I traveled to Europe, set new personal best laptimes on track and was making steady improvements on my mental health.
That all unraveled after breaking my leg for a second time. I’m not gonna lie, it’s been a huge challenge for me and the length of the recovery time is still something I’m struggling with. There are days where I am miserable and mean just because I’m in pain. But in between all the struggles there is also joy. There is time to rest and recover and I am slowly able to reciprocate all of the love that has been shown to me. I appreciate everyone who’s helped me and everyone who’s reached out (before and after being injured). The world can be a cruel place but it’s all made better by those who have shown me kindness. I truly love everyone who’s been a part of this journey, even those whose path only briefly crossed mine.
Wherever your journey takes you I hope you have an amazing year to come.
I turned 30 recently and it feels like it’s supposed to be a big deal, and maybe with hindsight it will be a turning point, but for now, I feel like the same dumb kid who just wants to live in the moment and go fast on two wheels.
Then on the other hand, I look at how far I’ve come in the last decade. When I look back, I’m blown away by the fact that I’m literally not the same person. I went through puberty a second time (as if the first time wasn’t bad enough) and have a whole new name, body, and friends. I find myself in new communities that I never would have thought I could be so deeply connected to. I’ve met so, so many amazing people and I wish I had the time to devote more of my life to all of you. I truly love all of my friends.
Speaking of love, somewhere in the last decade I also experienced love at first sight. I know, I know… It sounds insane, and most of the time I don’t believe it, even though it happened to me. I still can’t believe how strong our relationship has been since the moment our eyes met. Thank you so much for supporting me through all the insanity that life throws at us. I truly couldn’t do it without you.
Reflecting more broadly on the state of the world it’s hard not to feel that people like me are in danger. Each time I see a new bill passed that limits the options and opportunities for trans folks I feel so much pain. The trend of anti-intellectualism seems to worsen by the week snd it’s a scary time to be queer. But I also take solace in the fact that this is still the best time in history to be outside of convention. I look around and am filled with the strength and resilience that can only come from community.
If the past decade is any indication, than I cannot even begin to speculate on what the next decade holds. Feels as though my journey is just getting started and I have so far to go.
I’m not big into musicals but Rent was really onto something when they sang “how do you measure a year?” And I guess the answer on Instagram isn’t love. It’s with 12 x 0.5 second clips. So here’s 6 seconds out of my year’s 525,600 minutes.
