Monday. Morning: touch base. Afternoon: presentation. Haven’t had a day like this in a while, so I thought I’d attempt to clean up a bit.
Keyword: attempt.
My heart’s always been set on the simple elegance of the CD. And it so happens that my thirdhand turbocharged tangerine can still healthily load seven discs at one time. I’m not on the road as much as I used to be, but it can’t be a bad thing to have some goodness at hand.
I periodically swap out all seven discs in one go, except that I was obsessively listening to the Gin Blossoms’ debut after grabbing it from a secondhand store two weeks ago.
This month’s rotation: Ash’s Nu-clear Sounds (1998), The O.C. Mix 1 & 2 (2004), Collective Soul’s Disciplined Breakdown (1997), Linkin Park’s From Zero (2024), Portishead’s Dummy (1994), and in the main tray, Coldplay’s Everyday Life (which is new to me).
I could just hook the car up to Spotify, but if the autolords have blessed me with a CD changer and good sound, I should use it.
What’s *your* car playing? 💿
People walk in and out of our lives; they’re never guaranteed to stick around. Time wears bonds away, and not everyone is obliged to stay. Those who do are truly your ride or dies—they see your worth, you see theirs, and you stick by them.
This song means a lot to me—and not just because it’s a killer song (which it is). 15 years ago, a person who outclassed me in every way introduced it to me and shortly walked out after.
For someone who (still) doesn’t understand French exits when it comes to personal relationships (friendships or otherwise), I was gutted. I felt that they’d left me with something profound: a few weeks of light and hope in what was otherwise a pretty dull period of my life (I’d like to think it was mutual). They were someone that I was chatty about with my friends at the bar. Someone to look forward to hanging out with. A vibe you didn’t want to shake.
They left. But they left me with this song, too. And no, I don’t think about them anymore, the same way that I can’t even remember how to spell the variation of their name.
But I do come back to this song when I feel lost, confused, or conflicted, because my love for it came from a positive place. It pulls me through when I need it to.
I take a lot of things at face value. I might also take the wrong things for granted. It’s nice for me to know when I’m wrong, and most importantly, why: so that I can understand you better. ‘Cause it’s what makes you, you.
I know that you feel that I’m not genuine at times; that there’s a facade that I put on. But this is me at my most authentic—a fat bloke dancing awkwardly to a cool Wilco song because he needs to get through something, though he doesn’t exactly know how he got there.
I’m pretty sure everyone does this. It’s life.
People walk in and out of our lives; but the songs will stay.
