Wishing my fellow bi+ people a happy #bivisibilityday and first time public hello to all as a bi / pan guy! 🩷💜💙
If you told me during my youth or adolescence (or even five years ago) that I’d be saying that, I wouldn’t have been able to dream big enough to believe you. The premise of being truthful with myself, let alone the people I care about or the world at large was simply unimaginable.
Having an amazing partner
@claspertorch who has been open with me about her queerness since the very beginning of our relationship first showed me what proud bisexuality could look like. I was (and remain) so amazed and inspired by how unapologetic she is about who she is.
But even in the face of that, as a guy, it felt like the rules were different for me. Growing up in the 1990’s in Massachusetts, a time when homophobia dominated mainstream culture (a culture I very much participated in), when “that’s gay” was a normal part of everyday language, when I heard things like “bisexuality doesn’t exist” and “bi men are actually closeted gay men” the idea of admitting I had parts of myself that didn’t fit into the tidy framework of “straight” was too scary to even momentarily consider.
And only in my 30s, after meeting proud bi men, who, like my partner, were unapologetically themselves, discovering the
@twobiguys podcast and through it the countless bi+ people and resources it features, and being in queer spaces, amongst people who lovingly held space for me wherever I was on the journey, with so much support from my partner along the way, I finally began to accept the parts of myself I had for so long been trying to deny.
It is not lost on me just how much our world has changed since I grew up, and how much of that transformation (and all the change that came before it) was the direct result of generations of queer and trans people demanding it. I am hugely grateful for their organizing for liberation and love, and to find myself in a world (however precarious) where being myself finally feels possible.
If any part of my story resonates with you, or you’re struggling with similar things, and want someone to chat with, know that I’m here for you. Please reach out! ✨
