Today, I’m launching Staying Human, a Substack where I’ll explore how we build a life with more connection, more joy, and more fulfillment.
Most of us have been sold a version of the good life that doesn’t deliver. Achieve. Acquire. Optimize. And we’ve been trying hard to do exactly that. We’ve checked the boxes we were told to check. But too often, we went home feeling empty. Like something was still missing. Something that couldn’t be filled with our phones or our feeds.
It’s not your fault. The problem is: we’ve been told a story that is incomplete.
Because the life that actually fills us up – the one our gut already knows, the one our best memories are made of – that life isn’t built alone. It’s built with other people. In kitchens and front porches and neighborhoods where people know your name.
In a world where so many forces are pulling us apart – that is selling us loneliness and calling it freedom – choosing community is how we stay human.
I call it the Together Life. It’s a new covenant but not a new idea. In fact, it’s the oldest one we have. We just need to choose it again. Together.
That’s what this Substack - and the larger ecosystem I’m building - is about. It’s time to challenge the societal forces that have too often promised fulfillment but led us in the opposite direction. It’s time for us to choose a better way to live.
I hope you’ll join me.
Link in bio.
The Staying Human community just built its first collective soundtrack. It’s a mix of resilience anthems, 90s nostalgia, and songs for the quiet moments when the world feels a little too loud.
Whether it’s the track that got you through residency or the one you sing with your kids, these songs are reminders of our connection to one another.
Check out the full community mixtape at the link in bio.
Which Mixtape mood is do you need today?
The older I get, the more I realize how special a mother’s love is. My mother still calls me every time I get on a plane so she can get the flight number and track the flight to make sure I get in ok. She’s still the one who can always tell when something isn’t right and I’m suffering quietly inside. She’s the one who still wants to come to every talk, watch every interview, read every piece of writing even though I tell her she doesn’t have to do that anymore. Most importantly, my mother is the one who taught me that giving your time, attention, and heart to the people you love is the most valuable gift you can ever give. Happy Mother’s Day to my dear mother and to all the moms who remind us what really matters in life. ❤️🙏🏽
For Mental Health Month and AAPI Month, we’ve been reflecting on what it really means to feel fulfilled, not just successful.
So many of us were raised to prioritize achievement, often without being given the tools to care for our mental and emotional well-being. But research, and lived experience, points us somewhere deeper.
The idea of a “Triad of Fulfillment” by Dr. Vivek Murthy—relationships, service, and purpose—reminds us that health isn’t just individual. It’s shaped by how we show up for each other, how we find meaning, and whether we feel connected to something beyond ourselves.
At the same time, this work isn’t just personal. Access to quality, affordable mental health care, and building systems that actually support our communities matters just as much.
This month, we’re asking: what does fulfillment look like for you?
#MentalHealthMonth #AAPIMonth #BrownManTherapy #MensMentalHealth #SouthAsianWellness
Today’s unexpected delight: a turtle my 8 year old daughter made in school. She had such joy on her face when she proudly told me about her creation. Kids are the best at delighting in simple pleasures. A beautiful reminder to me to do the same.
There’s so much discussion about personal longevity - but what about longevity in relationships? How do we build relationships that actually stand the test of time?
I recently visited an organization in Baltimore called Thread that is changing that through a “ten-year promise” to their students. Their story is a powerful reminder that longevity in a relationship is a choice we get to make every day.
This week on Substack, I’m reflecting on how we can all become anchors for one another that can weather any storm.
I’d love to hear from you: Who was that person in your life who was there for you no matter what?
Read the full piece at the link in bio.
How often does a friend’s face flash across your mind, only for you to tuck the thought away for “later”? We tell ourselves we’ll reach out when we have more time or the perfect words. But in waiting for the right moment, we often miss it altogether.
I’ve learned that consistency is the bedrock of trust. Connection doesn’t always require a thirty-minute deep dive; it can be as simple as a quick text to say, “I’m thinking of you.”
This week, I’m inviting you to try the “Reach Out” Rule: If someone crosses your mind, reach out right then. Don’t wait. The best time is the exact moment you thought of them.
Read more about the experiment at the link in bio.
Farewell New Mexico…how I have come to love thee in a mere 24 hours. Your sky, your hills, your solitude…all of it. Special gratitude to Merlin, the peaceful giant I met high up in the hills with piercing but gentle eyes. I will carry all of this with me for a long time. 🐴☁️⛰️☀️
Some of the most powerful ideas for connection start close to home — in our parks, libraries, community centers and on our blocks.
Through the Knight Cities Challenge, @knightfdn is inviting people across the 26 cities it serves to propose projects to improve their communities, including ideas to build social connection and strengthen local community life.
If you live or work in a Knight city, there is still time to apply with a simple application by April 30.
Learn more and apply at kf.org/kcc
Human connection is as essential to health as any biomarker. The question isn’t whether relationships matters, it’s what we do every day to center them in our lives.
I recently sat down with Dr. Vivek Murthy @drvivekmurthy , the 19th and 21st U.S. Surgeon General and the founder of the Together Project, to explore the science of social connection, the hidden costs of optimization culture, social media’s complex role in our lives, and why relationships matter for human health.
Listen to our conversation via the link in my bio!
There is something about a shared moment of wonder that can quiet, if only for a moment, everything that divides us.
For the 9 days of the Artemis II mission, our family was transfixed. I’ve been thinking about what this mission stirred in me, and I keep coming back to the solar eclipse of 2024.
At a time when the world feels so heavy, we need more wonder. Not to distract us from the challenges at hand. But to remind us of what we are capable of feeling — the awe, the hope, the catch in the throat when something is genuinely, undeniably beautiful.
What will stay with me is something Artemis II astronaut Christina Koch said after they had just traveled further from Earth than any person in human history — words so simple and so true that I haven’t been able to stop thinking about them since:
“We choose Earth. We choose each other.”
Koch’s words are a call back. Back to each other. Back to this small, beautiful, imperiled planet we share.
I believe most people are starving for the same things: meaning, connection, and the sense that we are part of something larger than ourselves.
Our instinct — to care, to hope, to rejoice together — is not gone. It is very much alive.
We just have to choose it.
Read the full piece at the Substack link in my bio.
Join me today for my first Substack Live.
I’ll be joined by my colleague, @drlucymcbride , to talk about the vital link between our health and human connection.
We’ll be diving into how we can better protect our well-being and stay present in an increasingly distracted world. I hope you can join us for this first one.
Monday, April 20
11:00 AM ET
