Allow me to reintroduce myself š¤ and contextualize something thatās been quietly blooming behind the scenes.
I was watching YouTube a few months ago when I came across a personal branding video that posed a simple question: Whatās a weakness youād like to turn into a strength?
My answer was immediate: Multiplicity. Shapeshifting. The rebrand AS the brand. (If youāve been here a while, you know.)
Enter the All of You on Board series, a creative exercise that just sort of spilled out of me (and hasnāt stopped since). Iāve envisioned a dialogue between four distinct characters - Strategy, Structure, Vision, and Values - each of whom represent different versions of me over the years, as well as different creative energies Iām constantly working to bring into alignment. (Think of it like Inside Out for your artistic process.)
Through writing, planning, executing, and editing these short vignettes, Iāve been able to come into deeper contact each of these characters ā what they prioritize, how they interact and see each other, and what strengths and liabilities each of them bring to the table. Itās been fun and also incredibly easy - two words that havenāt always defined my creative process - and Iām excited to keep sharing these episodes for as long as it continues to feel that way.
My hope is that youāll feel seen and mirrored in your own inner dialogue ā and of course entertained, because Gaga knows we all could use a bit of levity. The first episode launches tonight. Hereās to another pivot š„ and enjoy All of You on Board.
#creativejourney #artistlife #creativeintegration #innerworkouterart #allofyouonboard
Flip it and reverse it.
If you want to go deeper, my Self-Study Guide is available on Patreon ā complete with 30 foundational prompts designed to jumpstart your process and bring you into relationship with your inner world. Link in bio.
#creativejournaling #artistmindset #journalprompts #creativejourney #innerworkouterart
Thereās an afternoon in Portland that visits me now and then. Why this one afternoon infiltrated me so deeply I canāt say. Iād made muffins, vegan blueberry crumb muffins. Iād eaten three of them and then taken an afternoon nap. This was big for me back then, Iād been tracking macros in Portland, pulling two-hour two-a-days in Portland, parading my deadlift-sculpted booty around and leaping like a salmon off the couch each morning as soon as my oatmeal had settled. It was hard to take a day off back then, had to deadbolt myself to the couch once or twice a week under the guise of repair. It goes down easier if you call it a deload, tiny tears in the muscles rebuilding themselves, plus everyone knows a rested body looks better.
Anyway, Iād made muffins. And for once, I had no desire to go the gym. I remember it rained that day, not the dank drizzle that hovers over the city for months but a sparkling afternoon rain, the kind that hints at rainbows whether or not theyāre actually there. There might have been thunder, or the suggestion of thunder. And that afternoon shower took me back to being a kid on summer break, to coming home from the pool and settling in with wet hair and a SpongeBob hoodie, and reading or playing Crash Bandicoot or watching Two of a Kind and thinking this would be the week Iād finally start having perfect hair.
And I was 100 percent there, on that rainy afternoon; full but not overfull, and I touched myself to a man I canāt remember but he wasnāt really the point ā it was me making love to myself and the muffins and the weird warm wetness of a rainy afternoon and it all felt nostalgic and romantic in a way Iāve only found a few times before or since. And there was no IV caffeine drip or ambient fears about the future, no one to pose for and nowhere to be. Just the thrumming of live desire, of nowhere to be and a sense of being suspended in honey, of collapsing next to a lover only the lover was me and that was, for once, deliciously enough.
The yearning is a symptom, babe. If youāre ready to stop overthinking and get all of you on board with your goals, youāll love my Substack series āHow to Stay.ā Installment two is all about the Strategy archetype: my perfectionistic, burnout-prone overthinkers. Link in bio.
#creativejourney #artistmindset #selfsabotage #procrastination #creativeintegration
Self-study is sovereignty ā or, a case for being obsessed with yourself š
If you are a woman, neurodivergent, highly intuitive, mentally ill - all variations on a theme, in my opinion - youāre going to constantly be conditioned to doubt your own experience.
Thereās something deeply dignifying about owning your narrative. Journaling is one way to do that, which is why I share prompts and advocate for being in active dialogue with your psyche. But it really comes down to self-knowledge, in whatever form helps you settle into the seat of observation.
The more you claim and honor your own unique perspective, the more interesting work youāre going to be able to make as an artist ā and the more trust youāll build with yourself and what you see.
If you want to go deeper, my Self-Study Guide is available on Patreon ā complete with 30 foundational prompts designed to jumpstart your process and bring you into relationship with your inner world.
#creativejourney #artistmindset #journalprompts #creativejournaling #selftrust
Receive it.
My journaling ebook is on Patreon ā because self-study is sovereignty, and if you donāt author your story, someone will certainly do it for you. Link in bio.
#creativejournaling #artistmindset #journalprompts #creativejourney #innerworkouterart
I knew that I was the smart one before anyone said it out loud ā from the first time I watched Scooby-Doo at age six and chose Velma as my favorite. The years would go on to prove me right. Gifted, they said. Gifted like straight Aās and honors classes and near-perfect SATs. I assumed that I should be in charge of everything, and I was, never too busy to add another feather to my cap. I wasnāt the personality hire ā the one who made the killer first impression, the one you wanted around for the aesthetic or the clout. I was the one you wanted once I got all my thoughts on paper, once you realized I didnāt take the first no for an answer, and once that answer was so honest that you didnāt know whether to applaud my audacity or abash it. Most people applauded. I got used to the applause.
Somewhere down the line, leading with intelligence started to bring diminishing returns. I was a know-it-all, or too arrogant, or the vocabulary Iād gleaned from spending hours alone with books as a child made me condescending and rude. I didnāt do these things on purpose ā I didnāt know another way to be, and more to the point, I couldnāt imagine a world where I had value outside of being the smart one. So I puffed up and I pushed back. I said, let me own this, let me tell you what I know, I know, I know! I did the research, I ran the facts and figures, I read the self-help books and practiced my posture in the mirror. I learned about misogyny and the Dunning-Kruger effect and I still couldnāt tell you which was more at play, but I do know that the death grip I had on intellect as identity couldnāt have gone on much longer. (cont.)
Your daddy issues š¤ your creative blocks
If you hate being told what to do, but also wish someone would just tell you what to do⦠Congratulations! You have daddy issues.
But in this case, your daddy is capitalism. And the version of you Iām concerned with is your art practice. Your creative selfhood, if you will.
Honestly, your daddy may never show up the way you wish he would. So itās on you to start giving orders to yourself. Because as it stands, you donāt have a space problem ā you have a capacity block.
What guardrails can you put in place to help build your internal structure?
#creativejourney #artistlife #selfsabotage #procrastination #capacity
When the light and the caffeine hits š¤ TikTok told me big noses and hooded eyes are trending for 2026, which makes me want to scream into the void and also take ten million selfies. Fortunately we live in a world where I can do both, and thatās on feminism. Anyway Iāve only been waiting for 36 years to be the zeitgeist and you can bet Iām not going to waste it. Hmu if you need recs for a lip reduction, I know a guy
I love a good mirror and @hudvalwritersny is full of them. In all seriousness, the memoir writing process can be heavy, and the people you surround yourself with make all the difference. Last year this time, I was working on the first draft of my memoir State of the Process here; now, Iām back to edit the finished manuscript. Swipe for a year of hair growth, confidence growth, and the audacity to embody all of myself. Itās a lot easier to get all of you on board when your environment encourages you to take up space⦠Mojo Dojo Casa House decor notwithstanding.
Stop letting existential fear derail your creativity. This isnāt the time to quit ā itās the time to use your voice in a way that hones your skills and serves your mission.
#creativejourney #artistmindset #advocacy #artispolitical #creativeintegration
Finished my memoir and if you think Iām the type to post a crying selfie, youāre mistaken, maāam! Instead, youāre getting me at my most sexy and delusional main character energy. Never forget that Iām deceptively photogenic, extremely stubborn, and committed to giving you a reason to say āI knew her when.ā But only if you start engaging with my shit so I can build the platform the publishing industry requires :) we donāt live in a meritocracy, after all :) :) my Mariah impression is even better than my smize, if you can believe it